Drive Through Parenting Wisdom

You Can't See A Sunrise From Your Bed

                                                                                                                                                                                                 I woke up at 5:00 am last Saturday and was wide awake.  The only thing going on at that time of day is... sunrise.  I jumped out of bed and decided to try and make it to the beach before the sun rose.  I guess you can see that I made it... I stood alone for about 30 minutes.  It was amazing how light it was before the sun actually rose.  And then I saw this tiny sliver and everything seemed to move in fast motion from then on.  The sun rose so quickly and got so bright so fast I couldn't look for very long after it was above the horizon. 

There was another person nearby with his photography gear all set up.  {I figured serial killers usually don't set up their equipment like that.  I did stay close to my car for all those mothers who worry about that stuff.} On my way back to the car,I got a chance to chat with the gifted photographer named Ron Carroll. He emailed me a gift- these fabulous photos!  Serendipity!

As I stood in awe watching this show, I thought about all the people missing it.  And then I thought that this happens everyday for anyone who gets their butt out of bed to be graced with this sight.

Last night I talked to a group  of parents.  My message included- You choose your attitude.  A mother raised her hand and said that she has a t- shirt that says,

"You create your own misery"

She just realized how negative that was and that it really should read,

"You create your own happiness"

Sunrise is a great antidote to the deficit oriented, negative messages that we are constantly being bombarded with.  We parents have to choose to find the things that bring us happiness and serenity, and invite them into our lives and homes as often as possible.  It can create an upward spiral in your attitude instead of the downward spiral following the gloomy news on TV. 

Everyone, everywhere has a sunrise in their neighborhood everyday.  They have to choose to see it.

Here is a Simple Recipe for JOY:

STOP......NOTICE........APPRECIATE........

I didn't need a ticket, a reservation, a credit card, a baby sitter, a partner, a map, money or anyone's permission to have more fun than any human should have...

It is all there for you too.  You just have to choose it because you can't see a sunrise from your bed.

This sunrise is for you!  Thank you to Ron Carroll for sharing his joy with the world!

Anne

Words of Wisdom From The Grave...

Sometimes we need to hear from those parents of teens who have gone before us.  I know that many of you who read this blog may not remember Erma Bombeck.  Let me introduce you to this famous humorist and family philosopher and share some words from her that she wrote when she was dying from cancer.

"If I had my life to live over, I would have talked less and listened more.

I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained and the sofa faded.

I would have eaten the popcorn in the 'good' living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace.

I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather ramble about his youth.

I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day because my hair had just been teased and sprayed.

I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage.

I would have sat on the lawn with my children and not worried about grass stains.

I would have cried and laughed less while watching television - and more while watching life.

I would have shared more of the responsibility carried by my husband.

I would have gone to bed when I was sick instead of pretending the earth would go into a holding pattern if I weren't there for the day.

I would never have bought anything just because it was practical, wouldn't show soil or was guaranteed to last a lifetime.

Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I'd have cherished every moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.

When my kids kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, "Later. Now go get washed up for dinner."

There would have been more "I love you's".. More "I'm sorrys" ...

But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute... look at it and really see it ... live it...and never give it back."

Put the to-do list down and ask:

How can I have some fun today?

I am going on a little road trip with my 17 year old to see some colleges...and you can bet we will take some side roads, detours and make it an adventure!

Thank you to Erma Bombeck for her wisdom to us parents of teens,

Anne

Putting On The Brakes... A Story For Parents of Teens

My husband and I re-connect at the end of our work day by getting outside and moving.  We are happiest when moving forward on wheels of any kind- bikes, in- line skates, motor cycles {not me} and cars.  On those nights when the weather is not warm or dry enough, we walk.  And Willie, our dog always joins us in what is a walk for us and an adventure for him... or so we thought.

We were out last week at night in the dark, doing our walk around the block and talking and walking Willie.  We live in the suburbs and are fortunate to still have lots of trees and wooded areas in our neighborhood.  The three of us walk around this turn and Willie puts the brakes on and stops with all four paws scraping on the street before he came to a halt.  If there could have been sparks from his paws, there would have been.  He does not do this frequently but when he does, I must be well trained by him because I usually turn around and go the other way.  I start to turn and go back the way we came, obeying my dog...  They say that dogs train their masters and I guess I am living proof of that one.  My husband says, "Why do we have to do what he wants?  I want to keep walking this way."  So, I stop a few seconds and think about it and say , "Sure, let's keep going.  We don't have to listen to him just because he says so."  And I am thinking, "Why am I listening to a dog?"  So, we turn into the darkness of the night and take one step forward and then we hear them...  We hear howling from the edge of the woods.  Picture an old western movie where it is a night time desert scene with the moon and the howling and that is what it sounded like.  It made the hair on the back of my neck stand up...  My husband and I started laughing and realized that Willie was right.  He had a good point...  He knew about the coyotes in the woods.  So, we instinctively turned without talking and started walking in the opposite direction towards home.  May I add that this was the direction that Willie had suggested just moments earlier.  Willie turned to me and stepped in front of me and stood up on his back paws.  If he could speak I think he would have said, "Help me , I am about to be eaten."  I bent and picked him up {he weighs 5 1/2 pounds} as I unzipped my coat and put him inside so that just his head was sticking out.  I think I heard a sigh of relief.  We walked home with thought of Jurassic Park flashing through our minds.

Sometimes it is hard to figure which voice to listen to.  This happens to me as a parent also.  So much drama and story and sometimes even the most devoted parent can ignore the voice and message that needs to be heard.

Is there a Willie in your life that you need to listen to?

What message do we give when we just do what they want us to do?

What message do we give when we admit we are wrong?

What message do we give when we let our children be the leader?

Where do you need to put the brakes on?

I hope you don't have to hear the howling coyotes before you get the message.

Sending my best,

Anne